Post 26

The irony – if you are in an intimate relationship with someone you see as narcissist naked before you – and you maintain they are that….


If you are accused by another of being a narcissist

Then the one accusing is a narcissist.

And if you maintain they are (and they have all the tell tale signs of being one) you have two choices:

To judge them and walk away

Or to confront the wound in yourself (of not seeing beyond their protected pain and therefore your own) and in so doing a healing intelligence arises within you that caries you both beyond that pale of the wounded story.


An answer to What do narcissists do in relationships?

1 thought on “Post 26”

  1. The comments in the above Facebook Post were –
    Richard Dunbar commented :
    There’s positives and negatives about the popularity of the term narcissist in modern culture. One of them is that a lot of people are aware of the disorder, so it has brought a lot of light to the term and awareness for those involved or having been involved with one.
    A negative thing about the popularity of the term
    is that people throw the word around like a trend with whom “they think” is one through justification.
    All people are born as narcissistic into this world. Around the first 5 (I believe) years of life depending on the way a child is brought up determines what problems or insight into self they will have to work through for the rest of their lives.
    As I said before what’s unfortunate is that this is a trend term at the moment and the projections of the term can be very demeaning to a person that isn’t one. There are people out there with proper examination that get harassed by people in thinking or expressing they think the individual is a narcissist and it’s extremely painful for those involved. If it wasn’t painful the narcissist (based on current definition) probably wouldn’t give a damn.
    To be diagnosed as a narcissist in psychology a person has to take the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders test and have five out of the nine traits on the exam. The reason why it’s five and not just one is because everyone has narcissistic tendencies within them.
    It is my opinion that while yes a malignant narcissist is something to be aware of (although much more rare) the use of the term and throwing at people without proper examination is more toxic currently in today’s society.
    Protecting oneself from narcissists include defining ones own boundaries and respecting them. Usually a person discovers they are with a narcissist after being with them in a relationship like you’ve explained. There is great information out there by psychologists to help anyone trying to protect themselves from narcissists.
    There’s much more to the situation and I mean no disrespect in posting about this here, but just wanted you and others to be aware of how people can grasp onto a belief about someone else without proper psychological examination.
    I feel this article in Quora is watered down information in determining how the author relates to a relationship and information isn’t necessarily based on a proper diagnosis in psychology today.
    Nathan Curry replied :
    Richard Dunbar well the narcissist is the mythic story.
    Forget the text books. They don’t know shit.
    You have to go to the myth to understand it.
    Narcissus is a beautiful man.
    But you see when you lose the visionary understanding of logos – the understanding of nature and vour nature
    You become trapped in logic.
    Then the mechanical rapes you.
    I mean it literally takes away the harmony of your deeper capacities.
    So you have the patriarchal narcissist
    And the matriarchal one
    The genders compete for supremacy
    Neither wins
    Both try to.
    Both lose.
    1% divorce in India
    51% divorce in America
    One prioritizes tradition
    The other the revolutionary id
    In India the husband is god
    In the West’s it’s the reactionary pained leftist feminist with her incredible anger/conservative wife – both bitter.
    Both models are mad.
    Both reactionary models.
    Both can’t love the man with insight.
    Create homosexuals escaping the rejection of the feminine deception
    The feminine not honored creates psychosis
    The uprising of Sophia (the goddess of wisdom) means the narcissist is dropped.
    Not condemned.
    But you can’t contact that wisdom as a feminist. That’s impossible. As a humanist you can.
    Narcissus was a product of the Abrahamic traditions
    The Jewish prophets
    All need to be crucified or die in a pool of their own blood
    All are victims of the desert prophets
    The death of the deeper wisdom of the tantric cults and Parmenides, Pythagoras and Empedocles.
    The rivers in the desert are treating the symptoms
    Almost all modern medicine exists at this level.
    To end the feud that is Narcissistic – look anew at man and his pain points – then beyond the vanity and the greed for attacking and attention.
    Narcissus dies when you do that.
    Humanism flowers in its place.
    Richard Dunbar replied :
    Nathan Curry “look anew at man and his pain points.”
    Nathan Curry replied :
    Richard Dunbar right. And you have to do it in a very special way too.
    You see them like you see a an animal target on the horizon – it’s very real.
    But the loving hunter in you just sees the meal of that sacred animal that has fed the hunger to know in you.
    You see your assimilated love after the animal has been shot and skinned and prepared and eaten.
    And you can joke about it and say you loved an animal by shooting it and eating it – but no you real sense it’s animus – it’s spiritual nature and you remove the gross lie that the gross lie is what defines it (speaking metaphorically).
    Matthew Davies commented :
    Nathan Curry isn’t a narcissist an accumplished sociopath attaining unquestionable attention?
    Nathan Curry replied :
    Its just somebody who preserves their pain mechanism in a form of behavior that denies love and replaces it with avoidance of that focus.
    Matthew Davies commented :

    Nathan Curry commented :
    Matthew Davies do the enneatype test. Pointless otherwise. You are just stuck in the intellect but not actively learning.

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